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1976 Rat Race booth at the Fair
Click here for Rat Race Video taken at the 2008 Alaska State Fair. (Note: This is a large file and will take a while to download. Please be patient.)
Forget thoroughbred horses and greyhounds. Who wants to watch a bunch of skinny animals race around a track? Rats are more fun. Well, OK, gerbils. And they don't even work up a sweat. They simply roam around and around in circles until they stir up the crowd and then escape down a hole.
Which is pretty much what happens at the Palmer Elks Lodge annual Rat Race at the Alaska State Fair. It's the one time of year people gather together to cheer on the likes of rodents. They lay down bets, cross their fingers and yell in big, bellowing voices. It isn't hard. All you need is a couple of bucks and a little bit of enthusiasm. So step right up, folks. Pick a colored square and lay your quarter down.
Watch the wheel. It's a large, round wooden structure with 52 colored pie-shaped wedges with holes at the outer end of each wedge. Beneath each color is a small triangular compartment for the gerbil's getaway.
In the middle of the wheel is a large painted circle, a clear, round plastic bowl hanging above. This is lowered over the gerbil to hold it in place as bets are placed. Then the handler gives the wheel a gentle turn, the container is lifted and the gerbil is suddenly set free to roam around the wheel.
 Typical gerbil behavior dictates that it hesitates a moment before taking off, its back quivering, its ears pointed forward as if listening for a voice in the crowd. This stirs everyone up until they are all shouting mindlessly and urgently "black, red, blue." The gerbil finally shakes its head and scurries off toward the black, veers along the green and orange and blue and plops neatly inside the red hole.
Payoff for that color is 2 to 1. When it's time for the next bet, hands hesitate over the chancier colors. Orange and pink will net 10 to 15 times what you lay down, though of course there aren't as many wheel slots, and chances are against you.
So don't be shy. Reach in your pocket and slide your quarter down on the yellow. It's a bright, cheerful color, and it pays 5 to 1. Don't worry when the gerbil, that sly little rodent, sticks its head down the yellow twice as if to tease you and then scurries off down the black slot. You've just lost 25 cents, but big deal. You haven't had so much fun in weeks.
It's wild and exhilarating, yes, but it happens only once a year. We work hard to keep the event clean and we see it as a family event, a way for moms and dads to take a safe chance and laugh and yell along with the kids. And it is funny, watching that rodent scurry around the wheel.
It's ridiculous and absurd. Sometimes the gerbil picks the color you bet on, and you win. Sometimes it picks another color, and you lose. But remember, nobody goes away without having had a laugh or two, shared some fun with your family and friends, and donated some money to charity.
ODE TO A RODENT
I love the pace of a good rat race
That twitching tail, that furry face.
The crowd's from all over - even abroad
They think it's a rat, but it's really a fraud.
It isn't a hamster. It looks like a fur ball.
If the truth is revealed, it's really a gerbil.
From under the wheel, by his tail borne aloft,
He's placed under the cup. The bell rings. He's off.
The race begins. You're on a roll.
You hope the rat goes down your hole.
He stops. He sniffs. He makes a dash.
You stare. You cheer. You feel the cash.
You win. You lose. You don't much care.
It's just a quarter. You love the fair.
But you don't need a real long sermon
To talk about some squirmin' vermin.
And don't really worry, we'll never harm it.
We really love the little varmint.
The above poem was written by Alaska State Representative Max Gruenberg. Thanks Max !!
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